How To Have a Happy Marriage

How to improve your relationship with your spouse.

Marriage is a type of relationship that has a direct impact on our lives. We live our lives with another person, sharing mostly everything and hoping to add to our lives more joy, happiness, life experiences and prosperity.   However, the challenges of maintaining a happy and healthy marriage are many. From everyday conflict to complex problems like boredom, laziness, and infidelity. It is not easy to navigate life’s ups and downs, maintain love, and not fall victims of situations that when left unattended, can be very destructive to a marital relationship.   

The ideal relationship is the one where love and understanding abound.  Love grows by desire, intent, and interaction.  These means that we must want, plan and act in ways that allow love to flourish. To obtain understanding, we must be open to questions and accept our findings with a soft heart that gently considers and acts accordingly.   Love, understanding, and objectivity are the lenses that evaluate and act in a marriage that wants to thrive. Center all your actions in your intention for growth and goodness. Observe and care for your relationship like a beautiful plant that needs constant feeding, sunlight, and close attention.

Many couples fall victim to things like routine, loss of interest and lack of intimacy. It often happens when a couple is in a stage of comfort, where things are not moving, nothing new is going on, and nobody is working to better the marriage. These lack of everything, leave room to deeper problems like infidelity or intimate disconnection that could also lead to divorce.    

To escape from these problems,  try all you can to keep your marriage feeling alive.   Change the routine every now and then, make plans, and have goals.  Your marriage should be exciting. Keep the connection to your spouse as close and intimate as possible.   Talk yourself into having a happy marriage and share your thought with your partner. Keep reading below to find a list of suggestions to help you keep your relationship flaming.

In an ideal relationship, a spouse should be a good friend, an advisor and an active participant in the family affairs. Assuming these roles from the very beginning will bring trust and grow to your relationship but to further develop, you must allow time, patience and practice.  Communicate with your spouse about everything; vent or ask for an opinion, plan for the future together. Take turns at comforting the children. Doing these things will position your spouse in those roles thereby increasing the level of involvement and respect between the two of you.  

Taking an interest in your spouse’s hobbies and activities is another way to foster grow and draw near.   I know a  few couples that enjoy together activities that began as an individual hobby to one of them.  From watching sports to going to off broadways shows, bowling, fishing, game night and traveling.  Being open to exploring can lead to connection and discovering something you also can enjoy.

Engaging in healthy intimacy. When we kiss, touch, cuddle, hold hands, massage or tell something beautiful to our spouse such as, I love the way that cologne smell on you, you are strengthening a bound that is exclusive between the two of you.   For the most part, we are all welcoming of such gesture because It is good to feel loved at the physical level.  The benefits are many, more closeness, respect, trust, and more sex. Giving intimate and sexual stimulation to your spouse will create similar sensations in you as well.  Allow these sensations to grow by feeling them rather than analyzing them.

Family relationships and friendship can be a bonus to help build a healthy marriage. Doing things like at home entertainment, double date, house parties, calling family and friends over to help with a task all bring opportunities to either enjoy, work and have fun with each other and others as well.  Doing these things will improve at building common interest and will strengthen the connection between the two of you.  

Show your affections by giving each other gifts. Think about how special you feel when you receive a gift that you were not expecting.  No matter what you choose to buy, small or big, a gift says a lot; It means I have been thinking about you, and you are special, and I want it to show you my feelings.  Do not limit yourself to a special occasion but any day is good to make your spouse feel special.

Allow time alone.   Be understanding when your spouse set aside time for an activity alone.  Being alone is beneficial for all human beings. It is a time that can be used to reconnect, relax and come up with goals and expectations about pretty much everything.  Time for helps us unpack our thoughts, prioritize and grow.

Other beneficial activities are to enjoy and celebrate your relationship, just the two of you; romantic date nights, a time to decompress and enjoy each other while doing something that you both enjoy.  Go out for dinner and a movie, a nice walk or a comedy show. Also, do go out with your children, feel the goodness of family gatherings. When possible,  attend your kids’ activities together — bond with your spouse and your children and the rest of the family.

Ultimately, be creative. The sky’s the limit.  Talk yourself into growing more love and understating.   Always remember the love that brought you together and continuously ask yourself how can you bring more love into your relationship.  Use the knowledge you have on your spouse to tailor a plan. Your disposition to help your marriage growth is key to success. Treat your spouse with respect and treasure your relationship as a source of happiness, peace, and love that ultimately is or can be.  

Suggested Reading: The Power of Intention and Observation


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